Happy Arbitrary Day!

I got my Arbitrary Day gift today and I have to admit, not what I was expecting. I got several anonymous messages asking me about my Dr. Who preferences, so I got excited for a gift along those lines.

Then it arrived.

Well, it wasn't Dr. Who related. Really not even remotely. I got a college survival kit which near as I can gather was an incredibly entertaining trip to the local dollar store. She sent me 6 bags of ramen, a shot glass ring, 2 shot glass necklaces, a pack of test tube shots, 4 packs of Trident gum, a 16 pack of red Solo cups, a 30 pack of LifeStyles condoms (including flavored ones), a nifty bottle opener, aspirin, lotion, 2 bic lighters and a god damned weed bowl.

I should note I say she because her i's had circles
instead of dots. Name one dude who puts circles
 instead of dots over their i's. One heterosexual guy.
Name him, show evidence and accept your prize:
Flavored Condoms

I quote from the letter: "There's condoms if you get lucky, lotion if you're not so lucky and a pregnancy test if the line between gets a little blurred". Well I'm really happy I opened this one at work. I thought "Whats the most embarrassing thing it could have in it?". At least the professor thought it was as funny as I did. Also there is something about a shot glass necklace that just fills you with immeasurable depression. I don't really understand how it does it.

Oh this? Yeah its a plastic shot glass I wear around my neck.
Yes it does have a cartoon smiling tiki head on it.
Yes, in fact I have pretty much given up on life.

I would just like to thank this random internet denizen for a laugh and for my new intricate glass bubble blowing device. 

God damn it internet...