Thursday, November 28, 2013

Another Uneventful Weekend

Hey guys, figured I'll keep you posted on this boring life stuff.

So this week I didn't get to go to my sweet-ass job piling hardwood veneer, so instead I took a short little drive to the southern end of our state. Spent Saturday night drinking mediocre craft brews with an okay friend from high school. Then I had to get up first thing in the morning to drive further south just to meet a couple of douchebags I used to room with. Apparently if one of them flies from the west coast and brings some lady friend of his I'm obligated to meet up with them. Not like they're offering to pay gas money, assholes.

Spent a few hours having this self-involved cunt-waffle tell me all about his job and how it was helping the environment and stuff. Yeah I'm sure, let's just power the whole United States of America on fucking air. While we're at it we'll just replace cars with hot air balloons powered from our own farts. Dickhole.

Then they were all like, oooooh, lets go get some beers from some brewpub restaurant. Look how fuckin' hip we are, can't just eat at Wendy's like the rest of us? Got to hear all kinds of stories about these guys building airplanes and windmills and shit. Well I make shit too, you know? Hardwood veneer is serious fuckin' business. I stack some good fuckin' panels! Motherfuckin' full loads of 0 Select Whites, make a ceiling in a ski lodge or some shit. Asshats...

Then they're all like "Dur! Let's go to the mall, herpderpflerp!". Just full of original god damned ideas these cocksuckers. Then this fuck has the audacity to take him and his lady friend and fuck off to Rockland or something. Good thing I drove all that way. Fuckin' amateurs. Spent a few days wandering around shops in Portland and spending money I don't have. Went to the movies to see the fiftieth anniversary of some stupid cliche science fiction show. Fucking nerds everywhere. Had to help one little nerd pick up the pieces to his glowy stick, called it a screwdriver. What kind of fuckin' screwdriver doesn't even have a head. Just some glowy lights and stupid sound effects. Only screws he's taking out are the ones loose in his fucking nerd head.

Then these fuckin' people in the county have the audacity to make me go pick up a load of craft beer for them. Yeah, that's what I want to do, drive your stupid goods around. Now I have to go and eat a bunch of high carb food with these familial types. Thanks for fucking up any chance of success on my diet you sons of bitches.

Hope you guys had a better weekend, maybe with some super cool guy who drives a super cool Jeep and stuff. That would've been awesome.

<\sarcasm>

Wuv you,
Tyler

No comments:

Post a Comment